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How do I know my Mediator won’t take sides?

How do I know my Mediator won’t take sides?

mediator with a whistle and a red card

Working your way through a divorce or separation can be tough, especially when disputes over property, finances, or child arrangements come into play. But help is available. There’s a positive and amicable solution to help sort it all out – family mediation. It’s like having a helpful expert at the table to resolve matters. You might ask “How do I know my Mediator won’t take sides?” We look at that in more detail in this blog.

Family mediation is all about bringing in a knowledgeable and unbiased third party, called a family mediator, to help you and the other party figure things out. No courtroom drama here – it’s all about talking, understanding, and finding a middle ground. So, how do you know your mediator won’t take sides? Well, it’s because they stick to two essential principles: impartiality and neutrality.

Understanding the Nature of Family Mediation

Think of family mediation like a progressive conversation, with a guide who makes sure things are fair and you are both heard. Organisations like the Family Mediation Council set high standards to make sure your mediator is qualified to do this. They have rules and significant training to keep things professional and fair, so you’re in good hands.

The Training and Expertise Involved

Your family mediator will have been through ongoing training to become confident at solving conflicts. You can see they have completed this training by showing they are a “Trained Family Mediator” or “Accredited Family Mediator.” These qualifications show they’ve got the skills and experience to help you out.

There are three levels of family mediator:

  • Trained Family Mediator (WTA) – This indicates they have successfully completed an FMC approved family mediation training course. They will usually be working towards their accreditation.
  • Accredited Family Mediator (FMCA) – This shows the mediator has completed a portfolio of cases, which usually takes about 2 years.
  • Professional Practise Consultant (PPC) – A PPC is the most experienced family mediator and will have successfully passed a further PPC course and will have several years of experience. They will coach and help other family mediators.

Mediate UK help our family mediators with additional training, over and above the minimum requirements. This includes at least 10 hours of observations, co-mediations and ongoing support. It gives our clients confidence in their mediator to help them get to an amicable agreement.



The Value of Family Mediation

Your mediator is not just a neutral bystander – they’re pros at resolving conflicts and helping communication. They make sure everyone gets a chance to speak and create a safe space where no one feels judged. They follow rules to stay fair, separating any personal feelings from the job. Our method of progressive mediation, means they are trained to help you move conversations on, keep you focused on the future, not the past and help you prioritise any children of the family.

The family mediation journey usually starts with an informal meeting called a MIAM (Mediation Information Assessment Meeting). The mediator explains how things work and checks if mediation is a good fit and suitable for your situation. If they have not already done so, the other party will then be invited for their own MIAM.  If all three of you agree mediation is suitable, you move on to the joint sessions, where your parenting, financial and property arrangements. The mediator guides the conversation, helping you reach an agreement.

The Role of a Family Mediator

It’s important to understand the mediator won’t tell you what to do or give specific legal advice, but they do have legal knowledge and can share this with you both. They help you understand your options and guide you through the process. Once you reach an agreement, they’ll draft some papers summarising it. These papers can later be used to make things official if needed.

Picking the right family mediator is like choosing any professional service. Check their credentials and see if they’ve handled cases like yours. It’s also about feeling comfortable and having a positive communication dynamic. At Mediate UK, we’re so confident in our team that if you’re not feeling it after your first meeting, we’ll set you up with a new, separate mediator for free.


In summary, family mediators are always neutral in their dealings with you. They’re trained, friendly, and committed to keeping things balanced. But they will challenge and correct in order to ensure fairness in the room where required. So, when you’re in the world of family mediation, rest assured – your mediator won’t play favourites. They’re all about making sure everyone gets a fair shot and finding solutions that work for everyone. It’s a win-win!

Mediate UK has a 90% success rate for family mediation cases, compared to the average 73% nationally.
If you want a free consultation to find out more and see if we are a good match, give us a call on 0330 999 0959

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