Last updated: April 2026
by Jess Knauf, Director of Client Strategy at Mediate UK, April 2026. Based on current UK property and family law, the Family Law Act 1996, and our day-to-day experience helping separated couples resolve property access disputes without court.
Key Takeaways
- If you both own or both rent the property, changing the locks is rarely effective. Your ex has the same legal right to enter as you do, and can simply change them back.
- If you are married, both spouses have “home rights” under the Family Law Act 1996, even if the home is only in one spouse’s name.
- If you are cohabiting and the property is in your ex’s sole name, your right to stay depends on the length and nature of the relationship and any beneficial interest you may have acquired.
- Where there has been domestic abuse or risk of harm, you can apply for an Occupation Order (form FL401) to exclude your ex from the property. This is the proper legal route to securing the home.
- Unilaterally changing the locks without legal grounds can lead to a court-ordered reinstatement and, in serious cases, an order excluding you from the property.
- Family mediation is the fastest and most affordable way to agree practical access arrangements while you resolve the longer-term property and financial settlement.
Can I change the locks when my ex moves out?
Usually no, not safely. If you are both on the deeds or tenancy, or you are married, your ex has an equal legal right to enter the property and can change the locks back. The only reliable way to lawfully exclude your ex is to apply for an Occupation Order through the family court, usually on the grounds of domestic abuse or significant risk of harm. Changing the locks unilaterally in any other circumstance can backfire badly, including the court ordering you to hand over a new key or, in some cases, excluding you from the property instead.
10 Options For Your Property on Divorce or Separation
Why This Question Comes Up So Often
The scenario is a familiar one. Your ex has moved out of the family home, but they still have a key and they treat the property as if they can come and go as they please. They may turn up unannounced to see the children, let themselves in while you are out, or take possessions without asking. Some people only realise their ex has been back when they get home and notice things have moved.
The instinct to change the locks is completely understandable. But whether you can do it legally, and whether it will actually solve the problem, depends entirely on the legal status of the property and your relationship. Below we walk through the four common scenarios, the domestic abuse exception, and the practical alternatives that usually work better than a locksmith.
The Four Property Scenarios
Whether you can change the locks depends on one of these four scenarios applying to your situation:
- You both own the property and are both named on the deeds.
- You both rent the property and are both named on the tenancy agreement.
- One of you owns the property, but you have both been living there together as a couple.
- One of you rents the property, but the other has been living there as a partner.
Scenarios 1 and 2: Joint ownership or joint tenancy
If you both own the property or are both on the tenancy, you should not change the locks without agreement. You are both legally entitled to possession of the property and either of you can live there. The fact that your ex has moved out makes no difference to that legal right, they can return at any point.
You are physically able to change the locks yourself, but your ex is equally able to change them back. They can call a locksmith or, in some cases, gain entry by force. Unless they are committing a breach of the peace, criminal damage, or harassment, there is usually little the police can do to stop them re-entering a property they have a legal right to.
The short answer is that you can change the locks, but it rarely solves the problem and can quickly escalate into a locksmith battle that serves no-one.
Scenarios 3 and 4: Sole ownership or sole tenancy
If only one of you is named on the deeds or tenancy, the picture is more complicated, and it is here that whether you are married matters enormously.
If you are married to your ex and the property is in your sole name, they still have a legal right to live there known as “home rights” under Part IV of the Family Law Act 1996. These rights exist automatically for the duration of the marriage and can be registered against the title at HM Land Registry. Changing the locks would infringe those rights and your spouse could apply to the court for an order to restore their access.
If you are cohabiting (not married, not in a civil partnership) and the property is in your partner’s sole name, your position is weaker. You do not have automatic home rights. However, you may still have:
- A beneficial interest in the property if you have contributed to the mortgage, deposit, or significant improvements.
- A licence to occupy, which is essentially a contractual right to be there based on the nature of the relationship and any agreement (formal or informal) between you.
- Rights as an associated person under the Family Law Act 1996 for the purposes of seeking an Occupation Order if abuse or safety concerns apply.
If you are the sole owner or tenant and you change the locks on a cohabiting ex, they may apply to the court for an Occupation Order to gain re-entry. In some cases the court can even order that they remain in the property while you are excluded, though this is unusual outside of abuse situations. This is not a step to take without legal advice.
When You Can Legally Change the Locks: The Domestic Abuse Route
There is one clear route to lawfully securing your home against your ex, and it applies where there has been domestic abuse, a threat of abuse, or a significant risk of harm to you or your children. In that situation, the appropriate remedy is an Occupation Order, sometimes combined with a Non-Molestation Order.
Occupation Order
An Occupation Order is a court order that regulates who can live in the family home. It can exclude your ex from the property, set conditions on their return (for example to collect belongings), or give you exclusive use of the property for a defined period. Once an Occupation Order is in place, changing the locks to enforce it is lawful and appropriate.
You apply using form FL401. There is no court fee for this application. You do not need to attend a MIAM before applying, and this is a recognised MIAM exemption.
Non-Molestation Order
A Non-Molestation Order is a separate but related order that prohibits your ex from using or threatening violence, harassing, pestering, or intimidating you. Breach of a Non-Molestation Order is a criminal offence carrying up to five years’ imprisonment. Many applications for Occupation Orders are made alongside an application for a Non-Molestation Order on the same FL401 form.
Emergency “Without Notice” Applications
In genuinely urgent cases, the court can make an order on a “without notice” basis, meaning your ex will not know about the application until after the order is made. This is reserved for situations of real and immediate danger, and the court will list a return hearing within a short time for your ex to respond.
These applications are complex and move fast. It is strongly advisable to get legal advice before applying, and to have a solicitor or qualified adviser present your case where possible.
Family Law Service
Need to Apply for an Occupation or Non-Molestation Order?
Our sister company Family Law Service can help you prepare and submit your FL401 application for an Occupation Order or Non-Molestation Order on a fixed-fee basis, including urgent “without notice” applications. No hourly billing, no uncertainty.
What About My Right to Privacy?
The Human Rights Act 1998 gives everyone in the UK a qualified right to respect for their private and family life, their home, and their correspondence under Article 8. Alongside this, the Protection from Harassment Act 1997 makes it a criminal offence to pursue a course of conduct that amounts to harassment of another person.
Even where your ex has a right to enter the property, they do not have the right to:
- Take anything that is clearly yours without your permission.
- Read your emails, post, or private documents.
- Install cameras, audio recording devices, or other surveillance equipment.
- Use their access to harass, intimidate, or stalk you.
These behaviours can amount to criminal offences, breaches of data protection law, or grounds for a Non-Molestation Order. If any of this is happening, report it to your local police and seek urgent legal advice.
Does It Matter Who Is Paying the Bills?
No. Who pays the mortgage, rent, council tax, or utility bills does not change the legal right to live at the property or enter it. This is a common misconception.
What it can change is your entitlement to certain support, including child maintenance, Universal Credit, or a single-person council tax discount. If you are now the only adult at the property, contact your local council to ask for a 25% single-occupant council tax reduction. For more on how day-to-day costs usually get handled when one of you leaves, see our blog on who pays the bills when one of you moves out.
Case Study: The Lock Change That Ended Up in Court
Case Study: Jointly Owned Home, Resolved in Two Mediation Sessions
A separated mother came to us after her ex-husband had changed the locks on their jointly owned family home. He had stayed in the property when she moved out with the children for a few weeks to stay with her parents. When she returned to collect some items, she found she could not get in. Her ex had also told her she was not welcome back.
She had been quoted £4,000 plus VAT by a solicitor for an Occupation Order application, plus the court fee. But there was no domestic abuse history, and she had voluntarily moved out temporarily. Her solicitor warned that the court was unlikely to grant an Occupation Order in these circumstances, and even if it did, the process would take weeks.
She booked a MIAM instead. We used shuttle mediation for the first session because the parties could not be in the same room. Over two sessions, they agreed that she would get a new set of keys the following day, her ex would give 24 hours’ notice before attending the property, and they would pursue a separation agreement to formalise the longer-term property arrangements.
Total cost: £240 plus VAT per person. Timeline from enquiry to agreement: 8 days.
“Changing the locks is one of those things that feels satisfying in the moment and almost always backfires. We see couples spend thousands on solicitors’ letters arguing about who had the right to change them back, when the underlying issue (access, belongings, contact with the children) could have been agreed in one mediation session. Unless there is abuse or a genuine safety risk, a conversation with a neutral mediator in the middle is almost always the answer.”
Jess Knauf, Director of Client Strategy, Mediate UK
What To Do If You Cannot Change the Locks
If you cannot lawfully change the locks and there is no immediate safety risk, the three-step approach below will almost always resolve the underlying problem faster and more cheaply than a court application.
Step 1: Talk to your ex
It sounds obvious, but most of these situations are resolved with a direct conversation. Agree in writing (text or email) when your ex will visit, whether they will give notice, how they will collect their possessions, and how contact with the children will be arranged. Written agreements create a record and reduce the chance of misunderstandings escalating.
Step 2: Attend family mediation
If direct conversation has broken down or is not possible, family mediation gives you a neutral, structured space to agree practical arrangements. A mediator can help you cover access to the property, handling of possessions, financial contributions, and child arrangements all in one process. Where direct contact is difficult, we can use shuttle mediation, with each party in a separate room and the mediator moving between them.
Any agreement reached in mediation can be written up as a legally binding document if you both choose. Mediation fees start at £115 plus VAT per person for an initial meeting, with full pricing on our costs page.
Need to Agree Access to the Property?
Book a MIAM and speak to an FMC-accredited mediator about your situation. Online, face-to-face, and shuttle options available, with urgent slots where the issue needs fast resolution.
Step 3: Apply to court
If direct conversation and mediation have not worked, and the underlying issue is not going away, the final option is to apply to court. This could be for an Occupation Order if there are safety concerns, or as part of a wider financial remedy application on divorce or separation. You would need to have attended a MIAM first for a financial remedy application, unless a MIAM exemption applies.
Court applications for property and financial matters typically cost £5,000 to £20,000 per person in legal fees, depending on complexity, before you factor in court fees and potential barrister costs. Almost every aspect of a property dispute can be resolved more cheaply and faster through mediation combined with a financial consent order or separation agreement.
How Family Mediation Helps With Property Access Disputes
Property access disputes are some of the most common issues we deal with at Mediate UK, and they are often resolved in one or two sessions. A mediator can help you work through:
- Who stays in the property in the short term while the wider settlement is resolved.
- What notice is given before a visit, and the time windows that work for both of you.
- How possessions will be collected, ideally in a single organised visit rather than multiple surprise calls.
- How mortgage, rent, and bills are covered in the interim period.
- What arrangements will be in place for the children and any contact at the property.
- How to work toward a longer-term resolution, either a separation agreement or a financial consent order on divorce.
If you have already been through financial disclosure, we can also help you agree the longer-term picture on property, assets, and any occupation question in the same process.
Summary
Changing the locks when your ex moves out is rarely a practical solution. If you are both on the deeds or tenancy, your ex has the same legal right to enter and can change the locks back. If you are married, your spouse has home rights under the Family Law Act 1996 that protect their right to live in the family home even if the property is in your sole name. The same principle often applies to long-term cohabitants with beneficial interests or a licence to occupy.
The only reliable way to lawfully exclude an ex from the property is through an Occupation Order under the Family Law Act 1996, usually on grounds of domestic abuse or a significant risk of harm. The application is made using form FL401, it does not require a court fee, and does not require a MIAM.
For every other situation, a structured conversation, family mediation service, and a short-term agreement about access will resolve the issue faster and cheaper than a court application. Mediate UK can help you get there in one or two sessions, with the option to use shuttle mediation if direct contact is difficult.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I change the locks when my ex moves out?
Usually no, not safely. If your ex is on the deeds or tenancy, or if you are married to each other, they have an equal legal right to enter the property. Changing the locks will rarely solve the problem because they can change them back or apply to the court for re-entry. The exception is where there has been domestic abuse or a significant risk of harm, in which case an Occupation Order is the proper route.
Is it illegal to change the locks on my ex in the UK?
It is not usually a criminal offence in itself, but changing the locks on someone who has a legal right to live at the property can give them grounds for a civil application to restore access. In some cases the court can order you to provide a new key or, if the situation is serious enough, make an order regulating who can live in the property. Unless you have an Occupation Order, changing the locks is rarely a lasting solution.
Can my husband or wife stop me entering the family home?
Not without a court order. If you are married and the property is the matrimonial home, you have automatic “home rights” under Part IV of the Family Law Act 1996, regardless of whose name is on the title. These rights can only be displaced by an Occupation Order from the family court, usually on the grounds of domestic abuse or a serious risk of harm.
What is an Occupation Order?
An Occupation Order is a family court order under the Family Law Act 1996 that regulates who can live in the family home. It can exclude one party from the property, set conditions on their return, or give the other party exclusive use for a defined period. It is the lawful route to securing the home when there has been abuse or a real risk of harm, and is applied for using form FL401 which does not carry a court fee.
Do I need to attend a MIAM before applying for an Occupation Order?
No. Applications for an Occupation Order or Non-Molestation Order on FL401 are exempt from the MIAM requirement because of their urgency and the safety concerns involved. You can apply directly to the court.
What if my ex is not on the deeds but we have been living together for years?
Cohabiting partners do not have automatic home rights, but they may still have a beneficial interest in the property if they have contributed financially or through agreed conduct, or a licence to occupy based on the nature of the relationship. In long-term cohabiting relationships, changing the locks can still lead to a successful civil application by the ex-partner to regain access. This is an area where legal advice is particularly important before taking action.
Can my ex be arrested for coming back to the house?
Only in specific circumstances. If your ex has a legal right to be at the property, their presence is not a criminal matter. However, if they are breaching a Non-Molestation Order, causing criminal damage, committing harassment under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997, or threatening violence, the police can and should take action. If you are in immediate danger, call 999.
Does it matter who is paying the mortgage or rent?
No. Who pays the mortgage, rent, or bills does not affect the legal right to live at or enter the property. It is a separate financial question that will usually be resolved as part of your overall financial settlement on divorce or separation.
Can my ex take their possessions without telling me?
If your ex has a legal right to enter the property, they can take their own possessions without prior agreement, though doing so without notice is usually inconsiderate rather than unlawful. They cannot take items that are clearly yours or jointly owned without agreement. If you are concerned about valuable or jointly owned items being removed, an inventory and a mediated agreement on how possessions will be divided is the best protection.
How much does mediation cost compared to court?
Mediate UK’s initial online MIAM is £115 plus VAT, and joint mediation sessions are £120 plus VAT per person per hour. Most property access disputes resolve in one or two joint sessions. A contested court application for a financial order or Occupation Order usually starts at £4,000 to £20,000 per person in legal fees. Mediation is almost always faster, cheaper, and less adversarial.
You Might Also Find Helpful
10 Property Options on Divorce Read the guide |
Separation Agreements View the guide |
The 15 MIAM Exemptions Find out more |
Shuttle Mediation Guide Read the guide |
Resolve Your Property Access Dispute Without Court
Book a MIAM with an FMC-accredited mediator. Online, face-to-face, and shuttle options are all available, and most property disputes resolve in one or two sessions.
